Friday, February 17, 2006

DUI Cliche Central

UPDATE: For the 3 people out there who haven't already heard, Capitol Hill Blue sources confirm Cheney was drunk during the shooting.

Any highway patrolman will tell you that a drunk driver will almost always claim to have only had one or two beers when they're pulled over. It happens everyday.

How many people do you know, who are heavy drinkers as Cheney is known to be, have only one beer -- When I worked at Motorola, there was a group of managers and staff who would go on hunting trips -- they would always come back with stories of hard drinking.

The other classic move of a drunk driver: once cop has them in the spotlight, grab any beer available in the car and start downing it. The idea is to get alcohol into your system the crime and blame any failed breathalyzer on the beer drank on the scene. This is pretty rare, because most drunks know better than to drive around with beer in the car.

However, reports that Cheney had a drink during dinner while Harry lay bleeding at the hospital says volumes. According to the sherrif's report, the first question the Secret Service had when the incident was reporting was if someone was headed over to see Cheney immediately. They weren't leaving it all up to the good ol' boy network -- if someone came over, Cheney's BAC would be blamed on pounding a few to calm down after the accident.

At this point, I'm convinced; Cheney was drinking when he shot Harry, and the hunting party thought he was drunk so they covered it up. We will never know, but it's the only explanation that makes sense out of Cheney's actions after it happened.

It was "the worst day of his life," when he "shot [his] .. friend." But he wasn't distraught enough to go check on the poor bastard? Hiding until he sobered up would explain all of the extracurricular activities... nothing Cheney cried about while hiding behind the skirt and Britt "Kneepads" Hume does.

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